The Fault In Our Stars by John Green (Page 280)

Hazel: Touch the cave wall.

Computer: You touch the cave wall. It is moist.

Isaac: Lick the cave wall.

Computer: I do not understand. Repeat?

Hazel: Hump the moist cave wall.

Computer: You attempt to jump. You hit your head.

Isaac: Not jump. HUMP.

Computer: I don't understand.

Isaac: Dude, I've been alone in the dark in this cave for weeks and I need some relief. HUMP THE CAVE WALL.

Computer: You attempt to ju-

Hazel: Thrust pelvis against the cave wall.

Computer: I do not-

Isaac: Make sweet love to the cave.

Computer: I do not-

Hazel: FINE. Follow left branch.

Computer: You follow the left branch. The passage narrows.

Hazel: Crawl.

Computer: You crawl for one hundred yards. The passage narrows.

Hazel: Snake crawl.

Computer: You snake crawl for thirty yards. A trickle of water runs down your body. You reach a small mound of rocks blocking your passageway.

Hazel: Can I hump the cave now?

Computer: You cannot jump without standing.

Isaac: I dislike living in a world without Augustus Waters.

COmputer: I don't understand-

Isaac: Me neither. Pause.

"…The man running toward me is not a man, he is a boy. A shaggy-haired boy with a crease between his eyebrows.
     Will. Dull-eyed and mindless, but still Will. He stops runing and mirrors me, his feet planted and his gun up. In an instant, I see his finger poised over the trigger and hear the bullet slide into the chamber, and I fire. My eyes squeezed shut. Can’t breathe.”

(Source: northwinters)

pikalukey:


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Luke or Mr.Burns the world will never know

pikalukey:

@AltPress: They’re bringing guitars back to the radio & are this month’s cover stars – @5SOS! Preorder now:

Luke or Mr.Burns the world will never know

(Source: fivesource)

r3b3lli0us-beck:

sarcasticgirly:

thisisnotmyfairytaleendingg:

HOW TAYLOR SWIFT WALKS .

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HOW DEMI LOVATO WALKS .

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HOW BEYONCE WALKS .

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HOW I WALK .

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I was so not ready for that last one.

I call it the thot walk

(Source: mariasolisponce.tumblr)

@tyleroakley: Some people know exactly how to make you happy. @ZozeeBo is one of those people for me.

(Source: zoellagifs)